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jam

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Reply with quote  #1 
I don't understand why I am re-acting the way I am over Zach's death.

I mean, really . . . I have an extremely full, busy life and yet, I feel as if I have been punched in the stomach.  I can't shake this "horrible" feeling that I have.

I have been in a rotten mood for 2 days now.  I'm trying to hide it, but I know I am biting people's heads off that don't really deserve it.

Here is the thing . . . I know Zach Slater is fictional.  I know TK lives his life everyday and is happy . . . yet I mourn for Zach as if he were a real person.  WTF is up with that??

My question . . . am I the only one who is taking it this hard??  This irrationally??  I know ALL of you are hurting . . . but is it to the extreme that I am taking it??

I even feel funny putting this in print.  Afraid some of you will be like . . . "this girl is NUTS!!"  But I'm hoping that at least just one person is taking this as hard as I am because then maybe I won't fear for my sanity!!

June

searose

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Reply with quote  #2 
If anyone thinks you are nuts, they haven't met me yet.

I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT ZACH SLATER IS FICTIONAL!!!!!!!!!!!! 

So now you can imagine how hard I am taking it!

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mandy

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Reply with quote  #3 
June
I hear you and understand you. And if you are NUT's then so am I !!!
As you know i have not been very well, in Hospital and off work. and to top that I am trying to cope with TK/Zach's exit from AMC (I have to say 'exit' because i cannot even type the *D--d* word) It has hit me too, more than I thought poss. Even now as I let you know that you are not alone in how you feel, I have a lump in my throat.
I keep taking a deep breath and try to stay positive for Thorsten's future. After all Thorsten must be hurting the most, after investing so much of himself over the past years to have given us the *Zach Slater* character that we hold so dearly in our hearts - And ALWAYS shall we do so.

And I am HAPPY to be NUT's OVER THORSTEN and any character he portrays

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searose

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Reply with quote  #4 

Quote:
Originally Posted by mandy
 After all Thorsten must be hurting the most, after investing so much of himself over the past years to have given us the *Zach Slater* character that we hold so dearly in our hearts - And ALWAYS shall we do so.

And I am HAPPY to be NUT's OVER THORSTEN and any character he portrays
Mandy, you are SO right about TK having invested so much of himself.  We came to know and love Zach because of him, and WE are hurting, but the emotional investment that an actor has to make in ANY character, even if it is a movie that gets filmed in a matter of months, is a lot.  Here, we are talking about a character that he played day in and day out for years, like his alter-ego,  I can't imagine how hard it must be to close that part of your brain!


I hope you get home from the hospital and feel better soon!

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jam

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Reply with quote  #5 

Thanks Searose and Mandy!!  So far there are 2 of you who are as nuts as I am!!  LOL!!

Mandy, I didn't know you were in the hospital.  I see you on FB all the time.  Hope you feel better soon.

This is the worst weekend for me to be home alone too!!  Hubby and daughter off to a soccer tourny and son in AC celebrating a friend's 21sst.  So here I sit . . . sad as all hell . . . dwelling on this.  I can't even bring myself to watch clips.

I am trying to train my brain to believe that Zach isn't dead.  Thats allowed, right??  That is what imagination is for, right??  So, to me, Zach's plane doesn't go down . . . he makes it home to his family and lives happily ever after!!

I won't see another second of AMC . . . because the last way I want to spend the holiday season is mourning Zach and watching him be mourned on AMC.

There is only 1 Christmas where I have seen Zach happy and that is when he was pulled out of the hole.  There is no way in hell I'll watch Kendall mourn him over the holidays. 

In my mind, Zach will be home for Christmas . . . where he belongs.

Thanks for the support guys . . . it really helps.

June


P.S.  This is truly a testament to TK's acting abilities because he has brought Zach to life in a way where we actually believe he is real.  Even mature, grown, intelligent women believe this!!


searose

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Reply with quote  #6 

If I imagine Zach at home for the holidays, then I will also see the parasaites invading his space.  So, how about imagining that Zach (with Prince Ian, of course) is STILL sailing the Mediterranean on RedWings?  That's what I will do!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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jam

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Reply with quote  #7 
Searose, I like to picture him with his family because that is what would make him happy.

No matter how I feel about Kendall sometimes I can't let go of the fact that she is who he wants.  And I want for him . . . what he wants.

I know it doesn't make sense, but I just want Zach to be happy.

June

mandy

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Reply with quote  #8 
I picture Zach coming back to PV the day after Kendall is told his body cannot be found, she then realises just how important Zach is to her and swears she will NEVER get invoved with Rylee ever again. (and to never go back on her word) But also in my senario I would have Rylee move away from PV to start a new life together (IE off the show for good)
Zach, Kendall and the boys playing on the frozen pond after Christmas dinner. A house full of decorations, presents under the tree. The smell of pies, chocolates and wood smoke from an open (guarded) fire. And later in the evening as the boys play Zach reads a Christmas poem or two.
This is what is in my heart & mind ---->DREAMY!!! ZENDALL !!!
And it is ALL thanks to Thorsten for making it feel so real. (even if it is not acted on screen)

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irishmcpaddy

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Reply with quote  #9 
No, no one here is nuts just a little blue over losing someone who has been that sweet little indulgence that came into your living room for many years. I use to think my Mom was nuts-she was just always so passionate about certain actors, certain films, plays, musicians so when she started to talk about Zach Slater a soap person I was a little surprised.  Yes, she always followed this soap since she was young woman but when she started to put this man in the category of fictional characters that were reknowned I figured that either she was on to something or just nuts. I was lambasted for monopolizing her time when she didn't go to the booksigning in Hoboken ( she had to babysit), when I finally got a good look at this guy at the 2009 emmys and made the mistake of saying I have seen him in the street, I was an idiot and should have stopped him-never again did I mention if I saw him in the street.  I started to read this board and watch a little more and what I was seeing was an extremely good actor that was very magnetic in his draw. I put her on this board and she couldn't keep up with it because her health was bad but I started to like it, so I stayed. I know I have come across too critical at times but I feel that in all honesty here you had a really good actor-shitty writers-a worse mangement team (as I gathered from here) and yet you go back to point one the actor and he still had the ability to work with shit and rise above it-that is impressive. This end to his role on the soap absolutely very poorly, and without a doubt the most unimaginative way to let him depart. It not only upsets the fans and alienates them from the show
but if the plot was to gain sympathy for Kendall forget it-if you did not like her before you'll surely hate her now. So as far as I see no one is nuts passion is not being crazy it is a wonderful thing whether it be a happy passion or a sad passion it makes you feel.  I love my Mom and how she has taught me to be opened to things in general particulary to the fact that soap
people are not all a pretty face and nice abs but once in a while a great gift that is underrated. Oh no...ranting again.......sorry. Continue to be passionate, this man will surface again somewhere better.

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Megan
amcgirl

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Reply with quote  #10 

I don't even want to think about it.   Even tv guide says ABC is nuts!!


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howru

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Reply with quote  #11 

trust me you are not the only one.
Just like you, I wonder, TK is probably having fun with his girls in NY and is ready to move on, but here I am with this weird feeling in my stomach and not wanting to do anything. Well, I don't want to say ready to move on. He's the one who actually lived thru the character so he's connected to the character. but If TK was here, I would ask him "how does he do it?" I want to ask him how he's dealing with this without affecting his person life lol because that's where I am right now. Seriously, i have been in my bed the whole day.

I even tell my self that TK/zach's character was supposed to end this beginning of the year in January. I knew what was coming. After two months, I slowly started accepting that TK wasn't coming back to AMC.
Then I hear that he's coming for three episodes.
Then I hear he's coming back for the summer.
Then I hear he's coming back for "most of october/november"
I prepared myself and told myself that it was only temporary, but everytime he came back, it would just bring my hopes up again. Then when zach leaves, I go into depression.
I still wonder why this is so hard for me to overcome especially when I knew what the end result is going to me for a long time now.
So no you are not nuts.

pah

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Reply with quote  #12 

  I know just what you mean, Howru.  I was moaning and groaning to my son this morning and he said, "You got all these extra days , and I thought you had already resigned yourself to his departure last December." I don't think I will EVER be resigned to a Zach-less world. Zach is so real, and the empty space he left behind is also very real.

Froggie

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Reply with quote  #13 

Quote:
Originally Posted by pah
I don't think I will EVER be resigned to a Zach-less world. Zach is so real, and the empty space he left behind is also very real.

(((((((pah))))))) You're so right, honey.  I've been pretty quiet (for me) through all this, mostly because I really can't bear to think or speak about it.  My life is pretty harsh these days, and not having the beautiful distraction of Zach is just more acid on the open wounds.  Love to you all, because I feel the pain too.  I really do.


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